Notes on the journey of motherhood

Blogging for introverts: part one

Swanston street tram

Blogging and social media are tricky territory for an introvert.

You see, my head is like Swanston Street; thoughts rumbling through like obnoxious trams every half minute, stopping, tinging their bells, people getting on and off, inappropriately touching each other, avoiding eye contact.

It’s so busy in my head that sometimes I forget to talk. I’m forever longing for quiet time to go away and process the day’s events, like a mouse nibbling on a crust in a dark corner. This makes social media incredibly overwhelming for me.

Putting a post up is a lot like taking the train to the city and back. It’s a mission. Yes it’s inspiring and great to feel connection with the world outside our seaside block but it’s also exhausting. I come home fried and it takes several days for my mind to settle from the wake of the trip.

To further complicate the issue, I really don’t like attention. Whenever someone new comes here the temptation to hide under the coffee table is palpable. Yet when you have a blog, that’s ultimately what you’re trying to generate in order to build a community around your space.

(See what I did there? I said ‘space’ instead of ‘blog’. It’s like saying front bottom instead of vagina. I’ve got issues.)

Furthermore, ‘blog’ is such a saggy, ill-defined word. Like gusset. Or strudel. I cringe when someone in the real world asks me about my ‘blog’. I like to think whatever it is I’m building here – this space, this experiment – while it may be half formed, it’s not saggy. In order to do this – whatever this is – I need to do it on my own terms, preserving the quiet spaces and at my own pace for otherwise there is no point in doing this at all.

So there’s going to be some changes around here, and all will soon be revealed. Well, not all …

Are you an in-ey or an out-ey? How do you recharge, online or off? 

21 Responses to “Blogging for introverts: part one”

  1. Kelly Exeter

    Oh I hope this means you aren’t going to write less here! I have gotten used to having you around again.

    But as for the rest,I hear you loud and clear. I have a higher tolerance for the whole social media thing and actually really love it … But ‘attention’ not so much. And every so often I feel overexposed and get a bit sick of myself … At which point I take a nice little break to recharge :)

  2. gabrielablandy

    This was lovely. I hear you when you talk about needing quiet time to process. It’s great to read in words what I get strange feelings about too, and your words show me the funny side, so that I can laugh about something that can sometimes get me down. Thank you.

  3. Jess WhoaMamma

    I am absolutely an ‘in-ey’. I am so socially awkard In Real Life (though I am improving, slightly). Pressing ‘publish’ on my first blog post scared me more than giving birth. I guess that was an act of giving birth too, in a way. My Facebook blog page acts kind of like my alter-ego. It’s still me, but it’s the braver, more outlandish me. Sometimes it’s easier to be yourself with people who don’t know you, does that make sense?
    I’m so glad you’re posting more often, I’ve missed your beautiful writing. You are one of my absolute faves. Can’t wait to hear you’re exciting news x

  4. Gill

    I write in my head while driving and today I “wrote” a blog post titled “blogging for introverts”. Seriously, we must have spoken about this? And i have just forgotten? Too weird otherwise!

    I’m an in-ey at heart but I have learnt to behave like an out-ey in some occasions. Being quiet is so, so important. To me.

  5. Lipgloss Mumma (@LipglossMumma)

    I can very much relate to needing quiet time to process. There are times of the day where I just want to be left alone to think, to process. To quiet the noise in my head. Rarely that chance comes along though, which is part of the reason I blog. To get all that stuff out of my head! I do prefer the term ‘space’ though over blog. I agree ‘blog’ sounds cheap and uninviting, there is a lesser quality attached to the word.
    Looking forward to your changes, as long as it means not less of you!

  6. fpc12

    I completely relate to this and it’s been the biggest challenge I’ve had since blogging. I’m an introvert and I’m also (strangely) private. But, I love writing and I love writing what is important and I love touching people with the stories I write. But. I find the social media expectations around today’s blogging completely frightening and overwhelming and responding to people’s positive feedback is a highly self conscious procedure (and yes, I’m aware of that word – that’s what it feels like, even though people’s positive words touch me deeply and keep me going).

    Thanks for this.

  7. Carli | Tiny Savages (@tinysavages)

    I cringe when blogging is mentioned in real life. My husband once brought it up while out for dinner with a couple from his work, the night went downhill from there!

    I agree with Jess that it can be easier to be yourself with people you don’t know but I do worry that people think I’m a stuck-up narcissistic twat when I struggle with attention and maintaining privacy.

    I love the tram picture, looks familiar. Library?

  8. ameliadraws

    now every blog i’ve truly loved ended with six months of me finding it please say it ain’t so…. i’m an outy, careening, but i like your words cause they teach me to trust and breathe and cultivate quiet. As i try new things even an extrovert might need to cuddle their introvert

    • rhythm & method

      There’s a spectrum isn’t there? The more time I spend at home the more I feel like a raging in-ey. I know that will change when my circumstances change.
      And no, not stopping! Just … changing.

  9. ameliadraws

    i think i am an anti-social introvert ;). And yaaaayyyy change is good i know your words will stay strong now feel free to crawl under the cofee table cause you use a laptop don’t you :)

  10. C.B. Wentworth

    I’m a total in-ey. Socializing has always been difficult for me, but the development of online social networking and blogging has really helped me come of my shell a little bit. Instead of battling nerves to start conversations with people, I find myself excited to jump into the community each day. :-)

  11. Theasaurus

    There was a really interesting discussion on Triple J’s Hack last week about introverts vs extroverts, and how we live in a society driven by and designed for extroverts. A lot of introverts (myself included) learn to display extrovert qualities in order to get ahead, fit in or secure a job. We tend to “fake it till we make it.”

    That might be why so many introverts are so successful. Society’s greatest minds and leaders could not have got where they are without introvert qualities. Time and space away from others are vital for creativity (art, literature, music, science etc.), as well as any higher-order problem solving.

  12. Beyond the Masquerade

    Definitely an in-ee with an out-ee blog.
    I like the way you describe your brief thought process. I tried recently but I don’t think it came out very well.
    I think I’m slowly progressing and learning to express myself in writing but its still very teenager-ee :)

  13. maxabella

    I’m pretty much an extroverted introvert. Seriously. I actually had someone describe me as that one day. Full of beans and love a social occasion, but OMG, I hate the attention. x

  14. nextphasemom

    I am always living in the world inside my head. My family have to at times call my name more than once because I am so involved in the conversation I am having with myself. I so understand you and I am glad that I found your blog.

    From one iney to another

  15. Rebekah

    I have been searching for someone’s thoughts on blogging as an introvert! Searching and searching, and I came upon your blog. Thank you, and please continue to write about it, if you’re at all interested in it. I am in need of advice and direction as I am in the midst of starting a blog myself. It’s so refreshing to hear writers like me comment, and I relate to hating my online presence every so often. Questions I have:
    - How do you decide the “line” between online exposure balanced between your love for writing and your readers? Where’s the balance?
    - Will I probably delete my blog after about 4 months? I am quite an “in-ey.”
    - Will I learn this as I go along?
    So nice to read from a writer with my same thoughts!

    • rhythm & method

      I only discovered my acceptable limits of writing about myself through writing about myself. When things felt raw, I knew I was close to the bone. In some instances I’ve posted anyway, because sometimes the reaction from readers is reassuring and worth it to know that others can relate.
      My biggest problem has actually been maintaining my own energy for blogging – as an introvert, I need downtime to recharge and the 24/7 nature of the digital world doesn’t always allow for that. Hence, I guess you could say I’m down with the ‘slow blogging’ movement.
      Good luck, if you get a chance leave a link to your blog and I’ll pop over and say ‘hi’. Cheers :)


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